Friday Fiction

18 10 2012

Friday Fiction time again. A careful look at the bus in the prompt sparked an instant idea, hope it doesn’t spark the same idea with others! Comments welcome.

Thanks to Madison for hosting this group, and good luck in all your projects. Rochelle will be in charge from next week.

Copyright Ron Pruitt

The History Trip

“Ok, careful now folks. No need to push, we’ve always got plenty of time. No sir, we won’t be stopping to eat there. I appreciate that it feels like a long time to a big guy like you, but we’ll be back here sooner than you might think. No miss, we won’t be collecting souvenirs. That’s right son, that’s because we have to stay on the bus at all times. Wouldn’t want anyone getting shot now would we? If we stay on the bus, they can’t see us.

“Right then if everybody’s ready? Welcome to Jefferson Historical Tours. Next stop Gettysburg,Β 1863.”



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34 responses

18 10 2012
boomiebol

very nice

19 10 2012
writeondude

Thank you.

18 10 2012
janet

Ooooh, a time travel history class! How cool would that be!? What an interesting idea and well-executed. Just a tiny thing–you want “collecting” rather than “collect” to go with the rest of the sentence.

18 10 2012
writeondude

Thank you, and well spotted. Correction made.

18 10 2012
Sandra

Nicely done, though I might skip the trip. πŸ™‚

19 10 2012
writeondude

Thank you Sandra. Trips to battlefields are not everyone’s cup of tea but I do find the American Civil War interesting.

18 10 2012
tedstrutz

nice take on the post…

19 10 2012
writeondude

Thank you, Ted. After seeing the number on the bus, it just couldn’t be anything else.

18 10 2012
Tom Poet

Nice! Do we get black powder guns? If so I am there.

Tom

19 10 2012
writeondude

No sorry, observation only. Wouldn’t want to muddy the timeline.

18 10 2012
brudberg

Bullet proof windows needed on that tour.

19 10 2012
writeondude

… and probably artillary proof too.

19 10 2012
Swirling Turnip

I loved this! A better plot than most T.V. shows on today! You may have something here.

19 10 2012
writeondude

Thank you. I think that genre has been pretty well covered, but who knows maybe there’s an original twist to be had in there somewhere …

19 10 2012
rochellewisoff

Dear Pete,
It sounds like a fascinating tour. Where do I buy a ticket? The tour guide’s dialogue said it all. You could hear the excited travelers in the background. Nice job.

19 10 2012
writeondude

Thank you my dear. Good luck with your forthcoming appointment.

19 10 2012
bridgesareforburning

Hi Pete,
I anticipated some travel stories, but time travel is a cool concept for this one, sort of counter-intuitive. Although, they could end up paying a visit to Jefferson, it seems. Great story! Ron

19 10 2012
writeondude

Thank you for the kind comment and thank you for the photo. As soon as I saw the number on the bus above the windshield, I thought “that’s a date”, that’s where the bus is going!

19 10 2012
Trudy

Great idea, Pete, really original take on the prompt! ( You are way more observant than me, I never spotted the number on the bus. )

19 10 2012
writeondude

Thank you, Trudy. The fact that I looked at the large version of the picture and studied it for clues probably says a lot about me. Not necessarily all good!

19 10 2012
Joanna (Lazuli Portals)

Ooh! I wish I’d thought of time travel. Great piece πŸ™‚

19 10 2012
Anne Orchard

Brilliant!

19 10 2012
Lora

How clever. I didn’t notice the number on the bus either. And to think it got your juices going for a wonderful story. I am also fascinated with the Civil War and would love to visit Gettysburg but in today’s world. Would be a horrendous site to see and visit back then.

20 10 2012
writeondude

I live in the UK, but my big dream is that one day I’ll come over and walk the Appalachian Trail, and take in the history on the way such as some of the Civil War sites and museums.

19 10 2012
vb holmes

You could make a fortune–especially if the tour comes with a “no-battle-scar guarantee”.

20 10 2012
writeondude

I think they’re safe, the bus is somehow protected from – or out of phase with – the local environment.

20 10 2012
rich

history sure is a trip. and they’re headed to what’s been called the most haunted place on earth, and they’re about to haunt it more. well done.

20 10 2012
dmmacilroy

Dear Pete,

Those numbers had me thinking along your lines right away. I’m glad I didn’t go there. You know what messy paradoxes show up when two time travel craft visit the same place from the same space. Besides, your story was way better than mine was ever going to be. Well done.

Aloha,

Doug

20 10 2012
writeondude

Having come up with my story on Friday, I went back and posted it Thursday evening just so I could get in front of anyone with the same idea.

20 10 2012
kindredspirit23

Ah yes, the “if you step on a butterfly” (effect) version. Love it!!!

21 10 2012
billgncs

good one — I never would have considered time travel, but it fit well.
Let me go back so I can see a T-rex.

21 10 2012
Kathy McClure

A brilliantly spun moment, she says arriving late.

26 10 2012
Madison Woods

A very interesting take on the prompt. I loved it!

27 10 2012
glossarch

Time tourism, now there’s a thought. Going to see a battlefield definitely opens up a lot of ethical possibilities. Quite a big story for 100 words, thanks for sharing!

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